While I wait for the Dec. 8th episode to upload, here is the translation for the Dec. 1 Perfume Locks. The second segment turns into a real Japanese lesson, so a lot of summarizing down there.
[ School bell tone at 0:25 ]
Kashiyuka (at 0:54): She said “Question Macaroni.” (referring to intro robot lady who says that they’ll be answering fan questions)
Nocchi: Ah! This is new.
Kashiyuka: To put it simply, if they ask, “What is your favorite food?” you reply, “Seafood.” I wonder if it’s okay to be that general?
A-chan: So a general, approximate answer is okay.
Kashiyuka: Generally we answer in depth, but this time around, we’ll be answering in short, general terms.
[1:20, Shitsumon Macaroni~]
First question, read by Nocchi at 1:35: If you were to put together a band, what instrument would you play?
A-chan: Even the question is direct.
Kashiyuka: I guess for myself, more or less, stringed instruments would be good enough. [A-chan and Nocchi are impressed with her answer.]
A-chan: For me, I’d say something electronic.
Nocchi (2:01): Umm, well then I’ll just choose something that hasn’t been picked yet. (A-chan teasing her saying “You’re the most general.” [Ichiban zakkuri])
[2:10, Shitsumon Macaroni~]
Kashiyuka reads the question from “a girl”: If you could play the piano, what song would you play?
A-chan (2:27): A famous song.
Kashiyuka (2:44): I’d pick one where I’d use my have to use my hands and feet. (A-chan is clearly doing an impression and the other two are cracking up. A-chan is wonderfully weird.)
Nocchi (3:03): Well, I’d play one with a lot of sounds.
[3:10, Shitsumon Macaroni~]
Kashiyuka reads the question: How do you normally eat?
Nocchi (3:29): I usually eat food deliciously. (The other two agree)
Kashiyuka (3:43): I eat food that is warm. You know, because it is getting cold outside.
A-chan: (3:53): I make sure I eat vegetables.
[4:08, Shitsumon Macaroni~]
Nocchi reads the question: Between kabe-don, kabe gyu, atama-don, which one do you like? We’ve been given three choices so we have to choose one of those answers. (Click the links for images that define what each action means)
Nocchi tries to explain what kabe-gyu means and defines it as hugging not only the person but the wall as well. The other two make fun of her explanation. A-chan doesn’t know what atama-don is and thinks it means to bump heads with another person. (I think Nocchi and A-chan then actually bump heads.) They then say that among the three, as long as they’re with the person they like, then any of them is fine. (Hysterical Nocchi laugh)
[5:36 Perfume Intro]
Robo-Lady: The next segment will see if the trio can translate their song titles from Japanese to Chinese following their WT3 performance in Taiwan.
Kashiyuka translates Dream Fighter while Nocchi says that there’s a little bit of a connection between the Chinese and Japanese alphabet. A-chan says “Perfume” translates to “kousui,” which is also the Japanese word for perfume. Nocchi says Kokoro no Sports translates to “Kokoro Undo (Exercise).”
Robo-Lady then comes on (at 6:22) to say that a song will play and they will have to translate it to Chinese.
First song is Laser Beam. A-chan thinks it’s “kousen” (using the Japanese kanji “Light” and “Line”) and Nocchi says “choku” meaning direct/straight. Kashiyuka then blends the two answers together to “chokousen” and says the kanji meaning “to shine” is in there somewhere. They start building on the word adding in “niji” meaning “rainbow.” Nocchi (at 7:00) says that it a little too happy. They settle on “Chokusha Kousen” literally meaning “direct rays of shining light.”
Second song is Daijyobanai. A-chan starts by saying that if you take it literally, it means something is not okay with Nocchi takes to mean the kanji “fu” (a negative prefix) is part of the translation. A-chan then builds it to “furyoukai” meaning “misunderstanding.” Nothing else comes to mind so they go with that.
Third song is Edge. Nocchi and Kashiyuka think that Edge is fine and doesn’t need to be translated. They then joke for a few seconds about it being “gake” meaning “cliff.” Nocchi then suggest “surudoi” meaning a “sharp, pointed blade” then throws in “kanehen” which just applies to metallic objects. They settle on “gake.”
Fourth song is Fake It. Nocchi jokes that this is a pretty bland segment. A-chan agrees and says it’s fun because we’re thinking together, but if you’re doing this by yourself, you’re probably having a hard time. No one is laughing at your answers or collaborating with you. Turning their attention back to the song, A-chan suggests “itsuwari” meaning “lie/fabrication” while Kashiyuka throws in “uso” also meaning “lie” and adding “kimochi” meaning “feeling” then adding them together to form “uso kimochi.” A-chan then says this song isn’t about a lying heart or false feelings, it’s the opposite. Kashiyuka then says, “uso hontou” roughly meaning “fake reality.” They settle on “uso hontou.”
Fifth song is Perfect Star. Nocchi starts with “kanpeki ningen” meaning “perfect person.” They also consider “kanzen” meaning “complete” and “hoshi” for “star.” Kashiyuka jokes “kanpeki boshi” meaning “perfect star.” Nocchi then adds “hito” for “person” at the end of that. A-chan then says she thinks it is “takane no hana” literally meaning “goal which is out of reach,” because your hands can’t reach it (stars). Kashiyuka then says that it’s useless to keep looking it up on their phones and Nocchi says she doesn’t think she has written the kanji for “ne” before. A-chan then jokes, “What kind of encouragement is that?” They settle on “takane hoshi” meaning “star out of reach.”
[12:00] Kashiyuka then says that it’d be cool to do this as a quiz with listeners. When she’s done talking, A-chan tells her to keep talking. Nocchi and Kashiyuka keep talking about making it in to a quiz by presenting listeners with the Chinese translation and having them figure out which song it is.
A-chan (12:22): Ok then. “Kai Gou Sou Ritsu Sha.” Kashiyuka and Nocchi are stumped and Nocchi asks, “What does kaigou look like in kanji?” Nocchi and Kashiyuka then answer at 12:40 – Party Maker! Nocchi then laughs about “kaigou” meaning “assembly/meeting.” Nocchi then says there’s probably other ones out there that are better than there and A-chan agrees saying the listeners have a good sense of what the answers are, so they should send Perfume titles to translate. They then urge listeners to send them titles to translate.
[End translation at 13:33]
Translation: Somehow or another, I feel like eating macaroni.
